{"id":537,"date":"2026-03-06T13:38:32","date_gmt":"2026-03-06T08:38:32","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/?p=537"},"modified":"2026-03-06T13:38:32","modified_gmt":"2026-03-06T08:38:32","slug":"dostoyevskiy-vatan-va-men","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/?p=537","title":{"rendered":"\u00a0 Dostoyevskiy, Vatan va Men"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: right;\">\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<strong> DILDORAXON TUROBJONOVA<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Bolaligimdanoq sof tuyg\u2018ularga orzumand bo\u2018lganimdanmi,\u00a0 garchi\u00a0 hozir o\u2018ylarim, tasavvurlarim, haqiqatlarim o\u2018zga bo\u2018lsa ham, Vatan haqida gap ketganida bola qalbim, eng inja hislarim uyg\u2018onadi. Ruhim ham birdan\u00a0 \u201cSerquyosh\u201dni maktabga kirishdan oldin yodlab,\u00a0 chuchuk tili bilan yurtni madh etgan qizaloqqa aylanadi. Vatan nima deyilganda, hamma qatori tushunib-tushunmay kitobdan yodlab olganim \u2013 \u201ckindik qonimiz\u201d deb javob bersam-da, muhabbatim o\u2018z-o\u2018zimniki edi. Hamon shunday.<\/p>\n<p>Vatanini sevish yaxshi, lekin hammaning sevgisi \u2013 Vatani borligini, sening sevging qanchalik muqaddas bo\u2018lmasin, boshqalar ham yurtini sendan kam suymasligini nega\u00a0 tushunishmagan, shu oddiy haqiqat nahotki ularning xayollaridan o\u2018tmagan bo\u2018lsa deb o\u2018ylardim tarix kitoblaridagi bosqinlar, urushlar haqida o\u2018qiganimda. O\u2018shanda xayriyatki, bular tarixda qolib ketgan, bari eski davrlarda sodir bo\u2018lgan, bugun yangi zamon, degan o\u2018y bilan taskinlangandek edim. Hozir esa bir ustozim darsida \u201cYangilik bu yaxshilab unutilgan eskilik\u201d, degan gaplarini o\u2019ylayapman. Eski davrlar, eski fojialar, xulosalar unutildimikan?<\/p>\n<p>Jurnalistika yo\u2018nalishida o\u2018qiyotganim sabab yangiliklarni doimiy kuzataman. Bir kuni ayrim rus targ\u2018ibotchilarining O\u2018rta Osiyoga tahdid ruhidagi fikrlariga ko\u2018zim tushdi. Sog\u2018lom ongga xos bo\u2018lmagan, imperial tafakkurdek zaharli g\u2018oyadan oziqlangan fikrlarga munosabatlarni ham ko\u2018p o\u2018qidim. Shovinizm deb atalgan, aytish mumkin bo\u2018lsa, xastalik haqida o\u2018qiyotib, men qahramonlari bilan xayolan o\u2018sha achchiq taqdirda yashagan, iztiroblariga sherik bo\u2018lgan, zamonning zahrini birga totgan asarlarni yozgan adib ham ana shu kasallikka chalinganini bildim. Men shu kungachga bilmagan, yoziqlarini o\u2018qimagan, fikrlariga nazar tashlamagan allakimlarning gaplari ko\u2018nglimda alam aralash g\u2018ashlik uyg\u2018otgan bo\u2018lsa, kitoblarini javonimning eng tepasida saqlaydigan yozuvchida ham shunday fikrlar mavjud bo\u2019lganidan ko\u2019nglim battar g\u2019ashlandi. Faqat bunisi og\u2018irroq, meni ko\u2018p vaqt tinmay bezovta qiladigan, savolli, lekin men javobini bilmaydigan, javob topish istagi\u00a0 bilan qorishiq xafalik edi.<\/p>\n<p>Ichimdagi qizaloq o\u2018zining sevgisi, Vataniga xayrixohligi\u00a0 bilan Dostoyevskiydan xafa edi go\u2018yo. Men yoziqlari orqali bilgan Dostoyevskiy iztirob nimaligini ko\u2018pchilikdan yaxshiroq bilardi, bilgani uchun u haqida yozolgan. Iztirob chekib yashayotganlar haqida ham hech kim undan yaxshiroq yozmagan bo\u2018lsa kerak. Lekin qanday qilib dard tasvirini mukammal yaratgan odam boshqalarga, boshqa millatga zulm qilish haqida o\u2018ylashi mumkin? Axir Vatanni tortib olishlari juda katta dard, vatani tortib olinganlar eng katta dardmandlar emasmi axir? Siz ham Vataningizni sevasiz,hech bo\u2018lmasa\u00a0 sizdagi sevgi yovuzlikdan uzoq deb o\u2019ylardim. Axir dard nimaligini bilgan odam yovuzlikdan yiroq bo\u2018ladi-ku, tushuntirib bering, Fyodor, derdim men ham. Keyin o\u2018qisam, Ibrohim G\u2018afurovda ham adibga shunday savollar bo\u2018lgan ekan. Dostoyevskiyni mendan ancha ko\u2018p o\u2018qigan, yaxshi tushungan, uni o\u2018zbek tilida sayratgan ijodkor sifatida unda javoblar ham bor edi.\u00a0 Tabiiyki, bu xulosalar bir qancha o\u2018rganishlar, o\u2018ylovlar, mulohazalar, tahlillar ortidan kelgan.<\/p>\n<p>Shu kungacha men adibni uning shaxsiyati, shaxsiy fikr-g\u2018oyalari emas, asarlariga ko\u2018ra baholash, sevish yoki sevmaslik tog\u2018ridir balki, \u00a0degan fikr bilan Dostoyevskiyga bo\u2018lgan xafalikni bostirishga uringandim. Lekin asarlarni ko\u2018nglidan o\u2018tkazganlari asosida yozishadi-ku, asar g\u2018oyasi muallifning xayolotidan suv ichib pishadi-ku, degan boshqa bir o\u2018ylovni boshlab ketardi. Bu mantiqsizliklardan hali ancha yosh ongim qiynalardi. Ibrohim G\u2018afurovning essesi esa nihoyat, chuvalib ketgan o\u2018ylarimni bir ipga tizib berdi. U hammasini boshidan, chiroyli tarzda, ayblovlarsiz tushuntirgan, vaziyatga mendan farqli o\u2018laroq Vatanini quchoqlab yig\u2018layotgan bola o\u2019laroq emas,dunyoni, ham ijodkorni yaxshi tushungan katta adabiyotshunos, katta odam sifatida qaragan. Esseni o\u2018qiyotgan men xuddi labirintda adashib, kalava tutib yo\u2018l topgan Tesey kabi edim. Nihoyat, hammasini avvalgidan yaxshiroq tushuna olyapman. Ichimdagi qizaloq jilmayib turardi.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 DILDORAXON TUROBJONOVA Bolaligimdanoq sof tuyg\u2018ularga orzumand bo\u2018lganimdanmi,\u00a0 garchi\u00a0 hozir o\u2018ylarim, tasavvurlarim, haqiqatlarim o\u2018zga bo\u2018lsa ham, Vatan haqida gap ketganida bola qalbim, eng inja hislarim uyg\u2018onadi. Ruhim ham birdan\u00a0 \u201cSerquyosh\u201dni maktabga [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"tdm_status":"","tdm_grid_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-537","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-esse-haqida"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/537","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=537"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/537\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":538,"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/537\/revisions\/538"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=537"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=537"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/esselar.uz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=537"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}